Tuesday 29 July 2008

Let it snow.....

The Countess has taken up fishing. Milady and Miss Viviana are quite addicted to this fascinating past time. Milady even bought a fishing boat, and if they go to a location other than the Isle where the new clan's Chapter House is situated, then they look quite odd indeed fishing in their cloak and hood. The fishbowls in the Tower are quite pleasing though.

With Milady being otherwise distracted, she has allowed me to wander a bit more than is usual. Having been turfed out of my previous room, and there being no real room for me at the Tower to have my own area, I have been considering renting rooms elsewhere. Sunday saw me travelling back to the beautifully scenic Victoriana Square. I DO love this place, and was quite taken with some terraced houses on a previous visit. Unfortunately, the type of letting that I'm interested in is quite in demand. I was most pleased to see the Mayor though in the Lettings Office, and having explained my predicament to him, he has assured me that should anything suitable come up, he will be sure to telegram me. I would feel most at home here.

Mayor Lindsay also took the time out to educate me in one of the customs of his town. I was surprised to see snow on the ground and he explained that the citizens of the town celebrate a Mini Yule Festivity at this time in the year. It really was most welcome, and VERY picturesque. If you're a little fed up with the heat in your part of the world, it really makes for a very refreshing time to take a sleigh ride in the snow.

The following day while updating Milady with my previous day's travels I noticed a most enigmatic look upon her face. I joked with her that she must be thinking about 'the one that got away', and she smiled politely (as she does whenever I make a poor joke), but I caught a sad glint in her eye as she looked at me. As she wasn't forthcoming volunteering any further information, I decided it would be prudent to let the matter drop for the time being.... but I WILL find out what is on her mind, I'm sure of it.

Friday 25 July 2008

Servants and Serving

Last night the Countess received a message from a friend about a sale that was taking place involving hairstyles. Milady had just put to port with Miss Viviana in an area they had been exploring, when she shared this information with her. Miss Viviana was 'off like a whippet', and Milady returned to the Tower to complete some work.

When Miss Viviana returned, a tall gentleman was with her carrying her boxes. She introduced him to Milady as SlippersFetcher Voom, a butler and personal valet by trade. Seems he is looking for a permanent post, and was hoping that Milady and Miss Viviana might be able to point him in the right direction. Miss Viviana had already briefed him as to my service and exploits, and it was agreed that his best step would be to get in touch with me.

I spent a VERY pleasant hour this afternoon in his company. We met up at one of Milady's town residences and compared notes and techniques. Slippers is very versatile in his service, and is ideally looking for a permanent position in an active household, preferably one that has activity during the daytime hours. Anyone interested in having their own butler, please get in touch with him.

I have to admit to feeling somewhat smug yesterday when I erected the new statue to the Dark Lady in the forecourt of the Tower. Milady was so pleased when I managed to find a replacement to the one that was taken from the land. I prepared a new stand and some burning bowls for it, and Milady made a new plaque.

A wonderful couple of days indeed.... the Dark Lady back in her rightful place.... a beautiful smile from Milady.... a new friend and fellow butler.... and a hug from Miss Viviana!! Unlife is good.... and I think I've grown a few inches in height too....

Tuesday 22 July 2008

Facts and Factions

It has been an eventful few days.

Clan wars have started in the Vampire community, with one very large clan dominating the upper echelons. A couple of the other larger (but not as large as the dominating one) clans are trying to merge in order to combat it, and ideas are being put forward to try and prevent the manipulation that is taking place.

The Countess was approached by both sides to try and garner her support, and Milady made it very clear to both that she was not going to get involved, other than to advise 'The Powers That Be' of possible solutions to the manipulation.

Due to forces at play within her own clan, Milady saw no alternative but to disolve the clan and to allow the two factions within it to strike out on their own. I'm not going to go into the details here, as I don't think that this is the place to do so, (politics, eh?) and should you be interested in any way, I know that Milady is happy to answer any questions that people have.

We were served notice to quit the Motherhouse by 5pm ..... the landlord decided not to wait and everything was turfed out at about 11:30am instead. I'm hoping that my books have not been damaged in the hurried packing... I still need to check the packing crates.

Milady has gone to a very old clan.... old and dusty, and quite dead. There were three remaining members, the leader and two minions, and all three of those were as dead as the clan. This was just what Milady wanted. She has no agenda, and has the peace and quiet to heal.

Many of Milady's childer have sent messages of support, and she has been most encouraged by those. She has sanctioned the use of the clan name to one of the factions, but did turn down the offer of the leadership role within it.

So, to all my brothers and sisters within the old clan, I wish you well, and hope that all will work out as you hope. Milady, Miss Viviana and I, are looking forward to a new future.

Friday 18 July 2008

Muses and Musings



The present from the Countess that I have mentioned previously, (the reading pillow) has been put to great use these last few days. Milady stirred from her rest in the early hours of Monday to find a note from her consort, stating that her travels were complete, and that she had returned home, and would see Milady when she arose from her rest once the sun had set.


To hear a 200 year old vampire squeal with excitement is a very strange thing indeed. Milady was delighted to find that her consort was waiting patiently for her as she opened the lid to her coffin. I smiled at hearing the sound, and decided that it would probably be for the best to leave them to each other, and so bid a hasty retreat to my room at the Motherhouse.... hence the pillow usage.


The next day, whilst attending to my duties at the Motherhouse, Milady's consort arrived. She thanked me profusely for having placed the chaise in the High Tower, and it seems that they had a most enjoyable night, especially the shopping that occurred. Something to remember: as much as vampires like to lounge, the one thing that will truly put a spring in their step is the opportunity to shop... clothes probably being a favourite of both sexes. I'll come back to this in a little while as I don't want to digress too soon. I was delighted to see the young lady and thought I was being most proper in my address of her. I noticed a strange look appear in her eye when I addressed her as 'Mistress'. I'm quite particular, I do like to accord the proper respect, the Lady Rachel I usually refer to as 'The Countess' or more often, 'Milady'. Milady's First-born, Laura Anne is always referred to as 'Madame'. So, I thought that Milady's Consort, Viviana, should receive the honourific 'Mistress'. I'm most pleased to find that Miss Viviana is not one to hold back if something is not to her liking, and she let me know that this title was certainly NOT to her liking. I was devastated to have caused her distress and apologised profusely. It seems that that title has other connotations where Miss Viviana originates, and having explained this to me, I was more than happy to redress the situation, and we agreed that 'Miss Viviana' ('Miss' being the title I confer on all Milady's female childer) would be the address that would be acceptable. I DO like plain speakers, they make things so much easier. Nothing worse than 'beating around the bush' and compounding problems by not speaking out. I like this young lady very much.


Being at the Motherhouse, I was able to join in with some of the other childer in a very enjoyable game of 'SLopoly'. Madame started the ball rolling, and we were joined by Master Aurelius, who was experiencing a most terrible connection to reality, and had to keep dipping in and out; Milady's new Sword Master, Miss AJ, a most cunning player off the En Garde field as she is on it; and Miss Ash, who has to be one of the most delightful young vampires it has ever been my privilige to meet. I employed my usual tactic (more as a necessity than an actual strategy) of collecting the four 'Telehub' locations, where the rent price increases with each acquisition of the like property. If memory serves correctly, Master Aurelius was the first casualty to Madame's massive building programme. The delightful Miss Ash was next to go (who would visit me now in the cornfield?) and then me. Miss AJ lasted another few rounds but unfortunately was not up to Madame's machinations. A VERY enjoyable experience I must say!


So, with Miss Viviana's return, Milady has been most kind and insisting I take it easy for a little while. It HAS been most pleasant to put my feet up and catch up on some reading. 'The Duchess and the Diamonds' has been most exciting!


Remember the digression earlier?... Vampires love to shop? I see you do, good. AS well as reading, I've also been pondering. Yes, Butlers, as well as ladies, can multi-task. Vampires are most particular about their 'look'. Milady has often said "I have such beautiful childer", and she does, no doubt about it. All of the childer that I have seen Embraced (where they turn from human - revenant - vampire) have been young. They've all been fairly attractive to start with, but once they have received the 'Dark Gift' (vampirism) they really do seem to blossom, and very quickly too.


Now, most of what WE know about vampires is handed down verbally. It would be very silly indeed to publish any sort of difinitive guide to being a vampire, as it would totally blow the 'Masquerade' (the strategy whereby all vampires deny their own existence, and pretend to be human). As a result, we quite often discover new things about ourselves. This is further complicated by the fact that all the various clans have their own 'quirks', distinctive powers and abilities that might be exclusive to that particular clan, or may be to just a few and not all. So what about this journal? Am I not 'spilling the beans' by putting things to paper? Of course not, I'm just an old fool and these are simply the ramblings of a madman. *Winks*


So, to develop this train of thought further.... remember I said about my greater speed since becoming full vampire? Also, the ease of moving the chaise to the High Tower? What if.... a major difference between revenant and vampire is the vampire's ability to regenerate? I was drained and made revenant as an old man. Whilst remaining a revenant, I simply remained in the state I was when made. As a full vampire now, will I regenerate? Will I become younger? Will I too, start to blossom? I have further to go to reach my 'blossom period' so perhaps it will take longer, but I have to admit to being somewhat excited about the prospect. Watch this space!

Sunday 13 July 2008

Just what Saturdays are for

I knew that the deadline for the items on the list the Countess had left for me would be the end of the weekend, so in keeping with another of the wonderful Butler pearls of wisdom - 'Never leave important tasks to the last minute', I set out to source the items.

I returned to the wonderful furniture emporium of Fatima Ur, where I had purchased my rather pleasing trolley. There were some very nice loveseats there, but nothing that I could find fitting for the Top Tower. I knew that there was some furniture in storage that could do the job quite nicely, but would require something more to make them fall into the category of 'loveseat'.

Milady has some wonderful cushions at the Tower, and so using my excellent powers of deduction *ahem* I discovered their origin. I made my way to the Heavenly realm of Pillow Talk. They have some very nice pillows, but the best way to find out what ones are most suited to Milady's requirement was to have a companion to help me try them out. This is a most tricky situation for a servant.... if I call ones of the maids to assist me, I could be accused of abusing my position of Butler, and, of course, I can't really expect the few young ladies of my acquaint to 'snuggle' with an old man... we're just not on those sort of terms. And to be seen 'canoodling' with an old boy, all be it for the most altruistic reasons, just does no good at all for a person's (I believe the term used these days to be..) 'Street Cred' (sounds like something you step in), they'd have to be mad.

'Poor Dara' very kindly answered my call, and we spent what was not an unpleasant (for me!) half an hour or so trying to locate the right pillows. We then sat by some daisies which very cleverly enable you to sit on the ground in a variety of ways, most useful when the ground is not really ground level, and she updated me with her latest adventures.

Thanking 'Poor Dara' profusely, I left her talking to a tree and made my way back to The Tower. Milady had risen when I returned and so I took the item from storage that I considered to be most suited to the task, and lugged it up the stairs to the Top Tower. Being Vampyre now makes these once arduous tasks so much easier. We placed the chaise, and I plumped up the pillows and placed them upon it. Milady was then quite insistent that they be placed correctly and bade me assist her in placing them. The next few minutes, being in such close proximity to Milady were the happiest I have spent in a VERY long time. Closing my eyes I could almost feel as though it was my beloved Jane there in my arms.... but that is another story.

Satisfied that all was ready for her friend's return, Milady requested that I accompany her to a fashion show to which she had received an invitation. First, we had to make our way to the Clan Motherhouse so she might ensure that all was well with her childer.

As we arrived at the Motherhouse, Milady requested to see my room. I led her to it and was then delighted as she presented me with a new pillow for my bed that enables me to read whilst relaxing. Milady then left me trying it out as she made her way to the Arena to watch the progress of the training of some of her Honour Guard.

We then made our way to SLIllustrated for the fashion show. A designer that Milady favours, Mr Nix Sands, was showing some of his new range as well as a couple of other very respected designers. Milady made herself comfortable and I took my place standing behind her seat as is usual. Milady turned her head, and smiling patted the seat next to her. This really was turning into a most pleasant day. No sooner had the show started, that I noticed a glaze appear over Milady's eyes and knew her to be in contact with one of her childer. When her eyes cleared Milady seemed most excited. It seems that two of her childer had entered an En Garde tournement that was about to start. Whispering quickly to me, she requested that I stay for the fashion show and join her once the show was over. She then disappeared in her usual plume of smoke, and I settled to a nice hour of having to look at some very nice apparel, worn by some very pretty people. It's a hard task, but someone has to do it *winks*.

After the show I contacted Milady's First-Born, LauraAnne in order that I might join them. She very kindly obliged and I found myself in the Edward Partridge Stadium for the En Garde Tournement. The second round was commencing and both Milady's childer were due to start. I made myself comfortable and followed Miss AJ's match which was very exciting indeed! Milady was watching Master Jeffrey's match and through the use of Madame LauraAnne's arcane arts, she was able to provide me with 'her essence' through which I could both relay the results of the match I was watching, and receive the results of the match they were watching.

Miss AJ won her match, but Master Jeffrey was foiled (pun) in his attempt, losing to the eventual winner of the competition. I understand from all that witnessed the event that he fought most valiently and made the winner have to work for it.

We then all made our way to another location within the stadium to view Miss AJ's next round. Another very exciting match took place. While were were watching, Madame LauraAnne asked if I had brought along any refreshments. Never leaving the Motherhouse without my trusty carpet wallet (so much smaller than a carpet bag, but able to hold just as much!) in my pocket, I was then able to wheel out the most pleasing trolley and adorn it with blood for the vampires, and whisky and port for Master Deej who is Lycan. It made for a very civilised outing, and Milady was most pleased that a number of her childer had come along to support the others competing.

Miss AJ won her round, and was then drawn to compete in the semi-final with the lady who defeated Master Jeffrey. We relocated once again, just across the lawn to another area. It was a VERY exciting match! Miss AJ rallied well, coming back from her opponent's early lead, but despite it being very close, Miss AJ lost to the lady who went on to win the final. An excellent time was had by all, and I think that there will be future excursions of this sort within the clan.

Milady noticed that one of her childer that had turned up to support, was listed on the world leaderboard. He is not a visitor to the Motherhouse, being located with his particular line some distance from it. He admitted to Milady that his circle had taken to En Garde, and so would be happy to represent the clan at the next tournement.

The hour was growing late, and so Milady allowed me to make my way home. I appeared in my room at the Motherhouse and got ready for bed. What a marvellous day! I had experienced the company of wonderful people all day, received assistance from, and provided assistance to them.
I looked at my pillow that Milady had presented me, and as I was about to climb into bed, I noticed on my bedside table, a beautiful pager bell. Madame LauraAnne had given me a lovely present of a bell that shows people when I am around, and allows them to call me if they need my assistance.

Life is good... and unlife, as one of a large family of Vampyre, is better.

Thursday 10 July 2008

Rest in Peace

One of my favourite ways to unwind is to tend the gardens around the Countess's Tower. I can often be seen in the moonlight wearing my leather apron and Caledon pith helmet, on my hands and knees on the grass. It gives me time to reflect for there is very little to do in the way of work in the garden. This morning, before going to my rest I was there again. I've now made the decision to welcome my change in circumstances, and can honestly say that I'm in peace about it all. Milady's mood has been excellent these past few days, I really cannot remember having seen her smile so much.
Alice, one of Milady's maids had arrived at the Tower early. She's human, but bears the marks of being in Milady's service with two small bite marks upon her neck. She came out of the Tower bearing a note in her hand which she presented to me with a smile. "'Ere y'ar ducky" she said as she handed me the note. I looked at the item, and saw my name written in Milady's most elegant handwriting. I broke the green wax seal and opened up the parchment and read the contents with interest, short though the message was, it seemed to impart the undertone of a major change ahead.
Alice continued to loiter, and didn't bother to try and read what was written on the page, for the only words she could recognise were my name, and her name. I've tried to teach her to read, but she's quite uninterested, and is happy enough being able to read the names that she can.
"Wossit say?" She asked with a great deal of interest. I narrowed my eyes and looked at her carefully.
"It's a request from Milady to purchase some items for the Tower... not really very different from all the other notes that you have passed to me before. What makes you think that this one could possibly contain anything different to the others?"
"Ther's anuvver wun".
"Another note? For me?"
She shook her head. "Nah, s'got a diffrent name on it... dunno oo's it is tho.. not seen it b'for." She winked as she added, "S'got a ribbun roun' it."
I couldn't help it, my eyebrows raised. "The Library?" I asked. Alice nodded vigourously.
Clutching the note from Milady I ran into the Tower and up the stairs to the library. I was pleased to note that where Alice could keep up with me before, with my new Vampyre status I was quite faster, and had the door to the Library shut and locked before she was within sight of it.
"OY!!" She bellowed from the other side of the door as she pounded upon it.
"I'm sure there is plenty for you to do Alice, I'll let you know what is going on in good time." I could hear her muttering as she made her way back down the stairs to the Hall.
I read Milady's note once again and then looked at the desk. Just as Alice had said, there was a neatly folded piece of parchment, bound with a green ribbon and sealed with green wax and bearing the seal of Milady's family. The silly girl had obviously picked it up and looked at it, but had returned it to the desk with the seal uppermost, and the address face down. I turned it over and read the name on it. No surprise really, and a small smile appeared on my lips. Returning it to the desk, this time the right way up, I noticed a new picture portrait in a frame leaning against the desk lamp. It was the addressee on the letter. I looked back down to Milady's note and read the item at the top of the list: 'I need a loveseat, for the High Tower'. I nodded and muttered to myself... "Well Janus old fruit, looks like you're going to be looking after another too." I couldn't help but break out into a grin.

Tuesday 8 July 2008

Second Thoughts

The Countess had left me instructions to purchase a new coffin for the Tower. Milady felt that she needed one of the type she uses at the Motherhouse that have a lockable lid after discovering a squatter using her one located in the High Tower at her private residence. Milady discovered the squatter when making a lightening visit to the Tower with her Seneschal, and unable to rouse him from his torpor, the ladies duly ejected him from the coffin and left him with his nose against the outside wall of the town square. Having recently had a conversation with one of her neighbours, Milady lamented the scarcity of sheep for some sort of photographic high jinx.

It was a great surprise to Milady to discover the squatter back the very next day. Unfortunately for the uninvited guest, Milady was accompanied by her Honour Guard Captain, an absolute giant of a vampire that Milady refers to as her 'tree'. He disposed of the squatter, and I was then tasked with disposing of the old coffin and getting the new one.

So, having secreted the new coffin in a much better location, I was tidying up when 'Poor Dara' arrived for a visit. 'Poor Dara' is one of Milady's childer, who unfortunately has been cursed with the 'Affliction'. To use her own terms, she is basically 'barking mad'. A very lovely girl nonetheless, the 'Affliction' can result after a particularly traumatic 'Embrace' (transformation from human to vampire). I DO know the reason in 'Poor Dara's' case, but this isn't really the time to divulge it. Anyway, she came in and was, not unusual for her, chuckling to herself. I enquired after her well-being and she then delighted in telling me of an encounter she had just had where another vampire unknown to her, had tried to make a withdrawal of her blood without so much as a 'by-your-leave'. 'Poor Dara' refused in no uncertain terms, and then spun around and grabbed the vampire by the throat and raised them in the air so that they were left kicking helplessly. This particular move is one that is only taught in Milady's clan and so scared the other vampire witless. Others observing the altercation were reduced to fits of laughter, and when 'Poor Dara' let the vampire go, the offender made a very hasty retreat from the scene. I have to admit to having been very impressed with 'Poor Dara' and the way she had handled the situation, and realised that had she been Revenant, the story would have had a very different outcome. Definately something to think over.

Some time later, Milady came home and fairly waltzed into her library. She had a very dreamy expression upon her face and handed me a picture she had obtained for me.

Apparantly Milady had taken a trip out with some of her childer. One of her latest childer had taken them to view some art works where the artist makes a 3d picture in which you can walk! I cannot imagine such a thing, but Milady had been suitably impressed, and arriving at the third site three young ladies wearing very little clothing were also visiting. Knowing of my appreciation of a 'shapely ankle' Milady obtained the image for me. I have to admit, I DO prefer seeing a little less flesh, but that's my own personal preference. Conversations were struck up between the two parties, and an invitation was made for the vampire party to 'help themselves' to a drink. Not needing a second invite, Milady and two of her party were able to partake of the offer. Milady then laughed as she told of the dancing that then took place, and the girls invited Milady's party to a club. They all had a thoroughly good time, and while all the others 'got down' (?) and 'boogied', Milady and her new childe tangoed into the small hours. Milady smiled at the thought, and said to me, "you should have been there Janus Dear, you'd have had a wonderful time." She then realised what she had said, and her face fell somewhat. Then her eyes flashed open and the smiles returned to her lips as she said, "you know, being a vampire might be the best option for you afterall." She winked, and made her way to her coffin, having placed another picture upon the wall as she went. I heard her hum as she climbed the stairs, and I do believe that she danced her way up there.

I sat down in one of the armchairs and gazed at the picture she had placed, and have to admit ... for Milady to have suggested that I stay as Vampyre she was certainly over the shock of the change, and the idea did appeal... perhaps I have no need to trouble Dr Mason afterall.....



Monday 7 July 2008

No Luck As Yet

The brightest piece of news in my 'unlife' at the moment is the fact that the Countess has forgiven my transgression. **Looks around to ensure no one is eavesdropping** Whilst it is said that her temper can be fierce, the upside is that once the storm has passed, then no more is said. Milady is not one to bear grudges, and after voicing her displeasure (I actually prefer it when she shouts, the quiet menace she can exude is MOST unsettling) the matter is usually finished as far as she is concerned.
I spent most of the weekend trying various methods to return my status to Revenant, but alas, to no avail. I am still Vampyre. I think I need to explain the difference, as I see it, between 'vampire' and 'Vampyre'. I tend to think of the defining statements to be as follows... "I am a vampire" and "I am Vampyre". A vampire is a bloodsucker, a bat, the loan shark down the road with the high interest rates, etc. A Vampyre is the specific species, the recipient of the Dark Gift, perhaps even a racial description. As I say, that is my view, and it helps me to differentiate.... but I digress.
With my efforts to return to Revenant having come to nought, I think I need to make an appointment with Dr. Darien Mason to see if his method will provide the cure I need.
I will keep you informed.

Thursday 3 July 2008

Whoops-a-Daisy

I've been laying low. The Countess was not pleased with me.
Sunday night, Milady was irresistably drawn to the Prop Spinners Pub in Caledon Steam SkyCity as they are having a series of 'holiday' parties in the month of July. Sunday (almost July) was a Halloween theme, and so Milady 'went as she was'. She delighted in the fact that she could watch out for people arriving and shout 'Happy Halloween!" as they stood taking in the scene, approach them with her fangs glinting in the party lights, and they would bare their necks quite happily for her being in the party spirit. Likewise, those that were already there who then stopped dancing for a moment, got the "Happy Halloween!" cry and bite too. The only ones that were safe were those dancing all the while the Countess was there. Fortunately, it didn't look too much like a scene from 'They Shoot Horses Don't They?' with people having realised that if they stopped dancing, they'd get bitten, as Milady wasn't there too long.
I duly arrived in SkyCity to collect Milady. I tried to unload the Hansom Cab, but the world being as it is on a weekend, was having none of it. So I walked to the pub, and summoned Milady's Lift. This is what we English call, what you refer to as an Elevator, and is also the term used when the means of getting home arrives to collect you. In the Colonies I believe they refer to this as 'my ride', but in England the term is "My lift has arrived", hence the pun.
The Lift/Elevator is a wonderful device and variation of the TARDIS, (available now from Wilber's Curios & Antiquities - Caledon Southend). Milady bid her friends goodnight, climbed in the lift and laughed delightedly as the lift 'pinged' as the doors closed. We then dematerialised from SkyCity.
Back in Milady's Tower the Seneschal was awaiting us. I unloaded some new casks of blood and set them up ready for distribution to Milady's personal staff. She's wonderful like that, knowing that our duties restrict our ability to spend time hunting for our blood allotment to combat the daily curse, she makes sure that our needs are provided for. Milady was happily chatting with the Seneschal whilst I moved the casks about. I then started to transfer my allotment from the cask to my own personal cask. I was daydreaming (should that be nightdreaming?) and quite taken up with listening to Milady's happy chatter and laughter, and REALLY not giving the matter the attention it deserved. All of a sudden a swirl of black clouds surrounded me and I started to elevate (without the lift!). Milady screamed in anger as she saw the clouds and me starting to rise - I had taken too much blood and had therefore made the transformation from Revenant to Vampire. If my heart were not breaking at the sounds of Milady's distress it would have been a wonderful experience.
So, 'Revenant Butler' no more..... now 'Vampire Butler'. I don't know if this is how things will stay, but the thought of a stake in the heart and the draining of my vital blood really doesn't appeal. But Milady is softening to the idea.... so we'll just have to see.....